There are many ways to express love. What is the language of love I express? Do people each have only one love language? Discover 5 love languages in this article and learn your own!
What is the language of love? Is this language only one? So, is love universal? Humans have long been theorizing and referring to love. But nothing is decisive about love.
Marriage counselor Gary Chapman, who wrote a book on the five love languages, has devoted himself to the study of love. In his book, The Five Love Languages: How to Express Sincere Devotion to Your Spouse, he analyzed the different ways people express these feelings.
Everyone has their own style and way of giving and receiving love, but most agree that love is very important in life. Meanwhile, Chapman suggests that each spouse can build a relationship in a better way if they discover the love language they express.
What is the language of love?
Chapman argues on several occasions that the love language is not the same, making it appear that couples do not understand each other or speak different languages.
They also say that people usually give love the same way they would like to be received. To do this, he suggests that after figuring out what the language of love is, you should learn your own language and try to understand the language of others.
1. Positive words
Positive words are one of the most important love languages. Saying that you want to let your spouse know how grateful you are or how important you are to you is sometimes a heartfelt act and makes you think more about the other person.
Know that in order to be able to trust that person, you have to be sincere and based on what you feel or think. It is important not to assume that your spouse knows how you feel. Recognition and confirmation help strengthen relationships.
Make sure what you are saying is not just empty words. Don't forget that actions speak louder than words!
2. Precious time
In a society where people instill ideas like multitasking and use their cell phones all day, it's more important to spend precious time where it deserves it.
In fact, there may be times when someone asks you how you are at a meeting and you don't know how to respond.
Because you can't say 'completely' attended the meeting. Therefore, time should be measured in quality, not quantity. Take the time to fully dedicate yourself to your spouse, listen to him, and share good moments with him.
3. Gifts
Gifts are one of the five love languages defined by Chapman. The author says that it is not the gift itself that matters, but the effort to find and purchase the gift.
But many question whether the word 'gift' is correct, at least in part. You will realize that a relationship in which all material needs are met and in which you receive an overflowing gift does not necessarily imply a relationship or interest.
Perhaps ' gesture ' is an appropriate word. Paying attention and paying attention to your spouse's tastes can make you buy something. This is very different from doing it out of pure helplessness.
Therefore, it is best to find a balance. One must not replace the other. We also recommend sharing experiences that many people can share.
4. Serve
Service is any act of helping others and doing them a favor. For example, the act of bringing food to a mother who came home late knowing she was very tired is also included in the service.
At this point, it's important to always check yourself so that you don't think you're actually doing something as a service that is expected in the framework of an equal relationship. For example, if your spouse is preparing dinner, cleaning the kitchen is not a gesture or a favor.
5. Body Contact
A variety of gestures, such as kissing, hugging, patting the shoulder, and stroking, convey the meaning of gratitude, companionship, and support. Some people prefer physical contact and need to be close, while others value personal space more.
In addition to being loved or expressed in your preferred language, it's important to find a balance and know the language of the person you care about. This makes it easier for everyone to convey their affection.
Love is more than just romantic love
Don't forget that love is made by genuine people. So rather than relying on ideas or stereotypes, it should be based on the people you work with.
Also, love tends to intersect, so no one has an exclusive love language itself. It's also important to keep in mind that relationships and people change over time, and it's important to be aware of these changes.
A way of expressing love is not to be confused with romantic love. Love, like a graceful dance, is reciprocal and should be based on respect.
Love doesn't do anything and has little to do with the romantic love myths that pressure and discourage people with demands, expectations, and beliefs. Connections require time, persistence, information, and a great deal of correspondence. It tends to be useful to know the main avenue for the affection you express.
Love language quiz: What is my love language?
To discover your sort, read the accompanying proclamations and imprint the ones that profoundly impact you. Channel it through: How would you show love? What do you gripe about seeing someone? What do you ask for or effectively need from your accomplice on an everyday premise? The one with the most assertions you reverberate with is your essential way to express affection. On the off chance that at least two dialects are tied for the lead position (which is normal!), utilize the interaction of end and work your way down the rundown until you are left with a couple of dialects that you are not able to leave behind.
The bottom line
Main avenues for affection are a helpful apparatus to improve how we convey and articulate our thoughts to one another, however they shouldn't be the most important thing in the world answer for joy. All things considered, it should work as a beginning stage that sets couples on an excursion to meet each other in a more significant manner and self-control better. Be that as it may, the work shouldn't stop there.